Relationship-Enhancing Ideas with Gary Janit
Relationship-Enhancing Idea # 1: The Power of Appreciation.
“In any relationship that matters to you, give praise and appreciation daily. Noticing and appreciating the good in others enhances the connection between you and creates a healthy relationship space”.
Putting your appreciations of your spouse or partner into words can transform your relationship and literally save your marriage or relationship.
Harville Hendrix & Helen LaKelly Hunt who came up with Imago Relationship Therapy created a ritual that at the end of every day they would share three (new) appreciations with each other to bring closure to the day. Wow! That would seem like gold standard but try even one heart felt appreciation every day can significantly move you toward your desired relationship.
Our brains tend to not notice the positive. We need to train our brains otherwise they tend to often default on noticing the negatives (especially if there is a lot of pain in the relationship). Pay attention to what is good in your relationship and life. Couples report that when they focus more on what they appreciate about each other they slow start seeing each other differently. What a wonderful human being I am living with. Something we’d known long ago but often forget over time.
Be the change you want to see in the world and if you would like a more appreciative world then go out there and give appreciations. Where better place to start than with your partner or spouse. Then extend that to your children, family, neighbours, community…
How do you feel when you are appreciated? Allow yourself to remember that wonderful feeling. Begin the appreciation movement. Start the ripple…
Relationship-Enhancing quote:” Appreciation can make a day, even change a life. Your willingness to put it into words is all that is necessary.” Margaret Cousins
Relationship-Enhancing practice: Look for and notice one new appreciation a day. Put this appreciation into words and share with your other half.
If you like this post then be in touch to discuss how Imago Relationship Therapy can further enhance your relationship or marriage. I offer couple counselling in various locations including North Manchester (Prestwich, Salford & Whitefield) as well as South Manchester (Wilmslow, Hale and surrounding areas including Cheadle, Bramhall etc).
I also offer premarital counselling, couple workshops as well as couple intensives.